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Brace yourself...hehe. It's prezzie time!!!! The following "projects" were done with full and deep felt thanks to ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
wannabebrit - they were inspired by her love and friendship, and are dedicated to her for her enthusiasm for my original characters - Declan Rai and Ashton Forster. Happy birthday, lady!
A little backstory (please read) -
I spent a great majority of 2004, and on into 2005, writing a story called "Encompassed" - it is to date, my longest and most .. uhmm, ambitious work of fiction. Based in the US QAF Fandom, it is a Brian/Michael slash story - but with a new twist for me: the added addition of original characters whom I was so very happy to see took hold of the imaginations and affections of many of the people who read the story.
And the reason they existed at all was because ofwannabebrit - her love (and mine) of the actors Aidan Gillen and Craig Kelly (and their characters Stuart/Vince) played a large (HUGE) part in the creation of the pairing of Declan and his Ash. And as I've said, the story built me up, tore me down and is in the end, one of the best I think I've done. A large reason why is the encouragement and devotion that she constantly gave me week after week, month after month. It was a huge gift to me, has been and still is... Especially considering that the main pairing of the story isn't her chosen favorite (as if ANYTHING could be with her love of Stuart and Vince...lol) - and soooooo....
I got to thinking...lol. (Always dangerous, that.) I've had requests for more of Declan/Ashton, but as yet my muse has taken a vacation of sorts, with only a couple small fics here and there to ease through the standstill. But I knew her birthday was coming up, and I so wanted to give her a gift that was Declan/Ashton related! Then I remembered she was a huge fan of cd mixes. BINGO!!!! hehe...
The Prezzies - Two fanmixes featuring 33 songs that tell the "story" of the last ten years of Declan/Ashton. One from each man's perspective, inspired by and dedicated to his love of the other. Each highly colored by their personalities (as I know them to be in my head...lol), their likes, loves and their fears. And finally, by their devotion and committment, each for and to the other. (((I strongly encourage those not familiar with these characters and their "special" connection/committment to read the story mentioned above. This fanmix, these song choices and my comments below will make MUCH more sense when you do....lol.)))
Gift No. 1 - The Declan Fanmix entitled "N-U-I-N" - artwork by the luvly talentedpiper47 (MANY THANKS for your beautiful artwork!)
Tracks & Download Links:
((Zips include tracks, cover art and full lyrics to all songs - available in both megaupload links and yousendit links. Individual songs can be downloaded from megaupload, to help those with dialup connections - but please, listen to them ALL!))
Declan Soundtrack – to Ashton:
Dedicated to Alexis – Mixed by xof – Happy B-day, Lady – Nov 7th, 2005
ZIPS - MegaUpLoad Link & YSI Link
1) Erasure – “Voulez Vous” Link (Declan entering the scene party, the night he meets Ashton – expecting just more of the same only to find his whole world set on its end by meeting the future love of his life.)
And here we go again, we know the start, we know the end / Masters of the scene….
2) Prince – “Curious Child” Link (The first couple lines alone make this perfect to describe their first “scene” meeting, but I also adore the thought of Declan seeing his ‘curious child’ for the first time. The song’s context is meant to be a May / December romance – however in this fanmix, it’s set in Dom/sub framework, hence a new meaning to the lyrics, “It’s not a crime.”)
In a room full of harlots and fantasy / Destiny beckoned us there
3) Garbage – “Queer” Link (In the beginning – another song that represents the learning curve. What Declan feared he’d find behind the smile, but learned instead that this gladly was the opposite of what he’d found. Even a Dom has doubts.)
Hey boy, take a look at me / Let me dirty up your mind / I’ll strip away your hard veneer / And see what I can find.
4) Aimee Mann – “The Moth” Link (Even the one in control fears the flame, but one look at Ashton and Dec was already on the road to gone. Set at the moment when Declan decides the beautiful sub kneeling at his heals will have to earn him before he’ll play. Before he’ll love.)
The moth don't care when he sees the flame / he might get burned but he's in the game
5) Rufus Wainwright – “Rebel Prince” Link (Set before Declan meets Ashton, or a time when they were apart. Seems like an Ashton song, but Declan has found in Ash what he didn’t know he was looking for. Because the master was mastered by love, his love of Ashton, his rebel prince.)
Where is my master the rebel prince…
6) Billie Holiday – “Blue Moon” Link (A big Billie Holiday fan, this is Declan’s sense of humor rearing its head. It’s sentimental, silly – and completely true.)
And then there suddenly appeared before me, / the only one my arms will ever hold.
7) The Perishers – “Nothing Like You And I” Link (Love how this song parallels the learning curve of Dec and Ash’s romance / scene progression. Declan did not allow them to fall quickly, but in the end he realized that there was indeed nothing like “you and I.”)
You held my hand so / very tightly / And told me what we / could be dreaming of…
8) Grandadbob – “Mmmnn” Link (There’s “more to learn, more to need” – “for you and I have just begun.” Their roles in place, the two are beginning the game that will become their lives – together.)
I like, ahh, what’s happening. / Don’t be far from me. / Every step for you and I / Brings on the morning. / Oh heavenly. / Don’t be lost from me. / There is more for you and I.
9) Depeche Mode – “Only When I Lose Myself” Link (No one usually thinks how much of himself a Dom must give, and in this case lose, when he gives over to love. That in helping the man he loves to surrender, he himself gets lost/found.)
It's only when I lose myself in someone else / That I find myself / I find myself
10) Poe – “Amazed” Link (Declan finds he’s learning as much from Ashton, as he’s giving in return.)
I’m amazed / When push comes to shove what I’d give to you / Everything
11) Billie Holiday – “The Very Thought Of You” Link (Declan’s devotion to his man, and the way Ash makes him feel.)
It’s just the thought of you, / The very thought of you, my love
12) Shane MacGowan & The Popes – “Rainy Night In Soho” Link (Can’t take the Irish out of the man – a reminder of early days. Dedicated to Ash, who is the “measure of my dreams.”)
Still there’s a light I hold before me / You’re the measure of my dreams / The measure of my dreams
13) Prince – “The Human Body” Link (Declan’s revenge for Ashton’s picking Jim V’s “You Turn It On.” Let it never be said that Prince doesn’t do club dance tracks…lol.)
Can U get me excited / Till my love is long? / Can U let me ride it (Oh yeah) / Till the early morn’?
14) Annie Lennox – “Love Song For A Vampire” Link (Because Ashton loves vampires. Declan blames Ashton very much for bringing this song into his life – but it’s the kind of blame that comes with a smile. Guilty pleasures often do…lol.)
Come into these arms again / and lay your body down
- - - - - - -
15) Bonus Track - Tristan Prettyman & Jason Mraz – “Shy That Way” Link (Not that I believe Declan is “shy” – but in this respect the song is more like a conversation between Ashton and Declan – and “shy” refers to “love-shy.” Remember, Declan made Ashton woe him before he gave into the temptation to love. A challenge to make his well-placed walls crumble and fall.)
well maybe, baby, I like it that way / shy that way / maybe I, like it shy that way / maybe I love you so shy that way…
16) Bonus Track – Melissa Ferrick – “Drive” Link (Have to have a song in which the Master is masterful, yes? This was a late addition, but it * fit * so well, that I had to include it.)
I’ll hold you up / and drive you all night / I’ll hold you up / and drive you baby ‘till you feel the daylight
Gift No. 2 - The Ashton Fanmix entitled "Evermore" - artwork by the luvly talentedpiper47 (MANY THANKS for your beautiful artwork!)
Tracks & Download Links:
Ashton Soundtrack – to Declan:
Dedicated to Alexis – Mixed by xof – Happy B-day, Lady – Nov 7th, 2005
ZIPS - MegaUpLoad Link & YSI Link
1) Erasure – “Gimme, Gimme, Gimme” Link (Ashton’s longing for fate to “gimme, gimme, gimme a man after midnight” – set just before he meets Declan.)
Gimme, gimme, gimme a man after midnight / Won’t somebody help me / chase these shadows away?
2) Kalan Porter – “Nature Boy” Link (They’ve just met.)
This he said to me / “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn / Is just to love and be loved in return.”
3) Prince – “The Question of U” Link (After their first meeting, when the mystery & question that is Declan draw him in.)
Must I become naked? No image at all? / Shall I remain upright? Or get down and crawl?
4) Leonard Cohen – “I’m Your Man” Link (An offer, the beginning of Ashton’s seduction of Dom Declan.)
If you want a lover / I’ll do anything you ask me to / And if you want another kind of love / I’ll wear a mask for you.
5) Sarah McLachlan – “Sweet Surrender” Link (Sub POV – Everything offered forth in the wake of new surrender’s questions and the sub’s self doubts.)
I only hope / That I won’t disappoint you / When I’m down here / On my knees / And sweet surrender / Is all I have to give
6) Fiona Apple – “The First Taste” Link (Ash’s POV – When the seducer wants to be the seduced.)
Darling just start the chase / I’ll let you win, but you must make the endeavor
7) Garbage - “Use Me” Link (It’s perfect. This song is Ashton.)
Use me, I’m beautiful / Take me, I’m yours
8) Bette Midler – “To Deserve You (Disco Remix)” Link (From the moment Ashton knew it was “more” – that it was love – this is his hope – to deserve.) ((Differing version to the F. Tasmin song from the UK QAF soundtrack – remember – Ashton isn’t Vince! But he is a Bette Midler fan, like all good little gay boys!))
And if I could be granted a wish, / I’d shine in your eye like a jewel. / How I want to deserve you.
9) Billie Holiday – “All Of Me” Link (On the cusp of moving from sub to slave, Ashton’s answer to Declan’s love of Billie Holiday.)
All you took / I gladly gave / There is nothing left for me to save / All of me / Why not take all of me
10) Ofra Haza – “I Want To Fly / Slave Dream” Link (Ashton’s idea of studio “art” music – but also how he feels having the freedom to fly knowing Declan will always bring him home. Ps – Blast this, Ashton does…lol.)
I want to fly!!!
11) The Magnetic Fields – “When My Boy Walks Down The Street” Link (In love and committed, Ash’s humor shines through – because for all that he belongs to Declan – Declan also belongs to him.)
Amazing he’s a whole new form of life / Blue eyes blazing and he’s going to be my wife.
12) Lucinda Williams – “Right In Time” Link (Ashton’s longing for Declan when they are apart – a lover’s longing.)
Not a day goes by I don’t think about you / You left your mark on me, it’s permanent a tattoo
13) Jim Verraros – “You Turn It On” Link (Time to play; time to tease. Pop culture waving its ugly head with this song – from the “GAY” American Idol Top 10 Finalist – As Ashton loves to tell Declan each time he plays it, to Declan’s chagrin. And yes, he expects a spanking for just putting it in the mix…lol.)
Love it when you take control of my body. / Love it when you get me hot, so don’t stop it.
14) Eartha Kitt – “Where Is My Man” Link (Ashton’s sense of humor again – his version of being a Diva Sub.)
A man who knows what I require / the things that I desire – Is there anyone out there who has the nerve?
-----------
15) Bonus Track – Scissor Sisters – “Filthy/Gorgeous” Link (The moment Ashton heard this, he laughed till he rolled. Then he played it at full volume till Declan was in a fit of perturbed giggles himself. Together, it’s a song of which they are both rather fond…lol. Like a private joke.)
16) Bonus Track – Kylie Minogue – “Fever” Link (The lyrics are fun, silly – and I can just SEE the gleam in Ashton’s eyes as he sings this. To his Doctor Declan - lol.)
17) Bonus Track – Arsenium – “Love Me Love Me” Link (Ash decided to sneak this one in JUST for his Declan. Think pop/dance mixed with traditional Russian folk music! Remember, Declan is half Russian! So if you’ve never heard Russ-lish Pop, here you go!!! Lol)
Lady - I truly want you to have a wonderful birthday, on Monday...lol. (She's getting this post over a day early so she can enjoy it over the weekend.) I hope you enjoy this musical look into their hearts and minds; the songs and lyrics where chosen to reflect each man intimately. You may have heard some of these songs a hundred times, but I tried to create mixes that were "them" and the result proved rather ecclectic...lol. So promise me you'll BLAST IT!!! That's always a necessity! (And remember that while I've put the songs in chronological order, I find that putting them on shuffle is just as much fun!!)
Happy Birthday!!!
hugs
xof
wannabebrit - they were inspired by her love and friendship, and are dedicated to her for her enthusiasm for my original characters - Declan Rai and Ashton Forster. Happy birthday, lady! A little backstory (please read) -
I spent a great majority of 2004, and on into 2005, writing a story called "Encompassed" - it is to date, my longest and most .. uhmm, ambitious work of fiction. Based in the US QAF Fandom, it is a Brian/Michael slash story - but with a new twist for me: the added addition of original characters whom I was so very happy to see took hold of the imaginations and affections of many of the people who read the story.
And the reason they existed at all was because of
wannabebrit - her love (and mine) of the actors Aidan Gillen and Craig Kelly (and their characters Stuart/Vince) played a large (HUGE) part in the creation of the pairing of Declan and his Ash. And as I've said, the story built me up, tore me down and is in the end, one of the best I think I've done. A large reason why is the encouragement and devotion that she constantly gave me week after week, month after month. It was a huge gift to me, has been and still is... Especially considering that the main pairing of the story isn't her chosen favorite (as if ANYTHING could be with her love of Stuart and Vince...lol) - and soooooo.... I got to thinking...lol. (Always dangerous, that.) I've had requests for more of Declan/Ashton, but as yet my muse has taken a vacation of sorts, with only a couple small fics here and there to ease through the standstill. But I knew her birthday was coming up, and I so wanted to give her a gift that was Declan/Ashton related! Then I remembered she was a huge fan of cd mixes. BINGO!!!! hehe...
The Prezzies - Two fanmixes featuring 33 songs that tell the "story" of the last ten years of Declan/Ashton. One from each man's perspective, inspired by and dedicated to his love of the other. Each highly colored by their personalities (as I know them to be in my head...lol), their likes, loves and their fears. And finally, by their devotion and committment, each for and to the other. (((I strongly encourage those not familiar with these characters and their "special" connection/committment to read the story mentioned above. This fanmix, these song choices and my comments below will make MUCH more sense when you do....lol.)))
Gift No. 1 - The Declan Fanmix entitled "N-U-I-N" - artwork by the luvly talented
piper47 (MANY THANKS for your beautiful artwork!) Tracks & Download Links:
((Zips include tracks, cover art and full lyrics to all songs - available in both megaupload links and yousendit links. Individual songs can be downloaded from megaupload, to help those with dialup connections - but please, listen to them ALL!))
Declan Soundtrack – to Ashton:
Dedicated to Alexis – Mixed by xof – Happy B-day, Lady – Nov 7th, 2005
ZIPS - MegaUpLoad Link & YSI Link
1) Erasure – “Voulez Vous” Link (Declan entering the scene party, the night he meets Ashton – expecting just more of the same only to find his whole world set on its end by meeting the future love of his life.)
And here we go again, we know the start, we know the end / Masters of the scene….
2) Prince – “Curious Child” Link (The first couple lines alone make this perfect to describe their first “scene” meeting, but I also adore the thought of Declan seeing his ‘curious child’ for the first time. The song’s context is meant to be a May / December romance – however in this fanmix, it’s set in Dom/sub framework, hence a new meaning to the lyrics, “It’s not a crime.”)
In a room full of harlots and fantasy / Destiny beckoned us there
3) Garbage – “Queer” Link (In the beginning – another song that represents the learning curve. What Declan feared he’d find behind the smile, but learned instead that this gladly was the opposite of what he’d found. Even a Dom has doubts.)
Hey boy, take a look at me / Let me dirty up your mind / I’ll strip away your hard veneer / And see what I can find.
4) Aimee Mann – “The Moth” Link (Even the one in control fears the flame, but one look at Ashton and Dec was already on the road to gone. Set at the moment when Declan decides the beautiful sub kneeling at his heals will have to earn him before he’ll play. Before he’ll love.)
The moth don't care when he sees the flame / he might get burned but he's in the game
5) Rufus Wainwright – “Rebel Prince” Link (Set before Declan meets Ashton, or a time when they were apart. Seems like an Ashton song, but Declan has found in Ash what he didn’t know he was looking for. Because the master was mastered by love, his love of Ashton, his rebel prince.)
Where is my master the rebel prince…
6) Billie Holiday – “Blue Moon” Link (A big Billie Holiday fan, this is Declan’s sense of humor rearing its head. It’s sentimental, silly – and completely true.)
And then there suddenly appeared before me, / the only one my arms will ever hold.
7) The Perishers – “Nothing Like You And I” Link (Love how this song parallels the learning curve of Dec and Ash’s romance / scene progression. Declan did not allow them to fall quickly, but in the end he realized that there was indeed nothing like “you and I.”)
You held my hand so / very tightly / And told me what we / could be dreaming of…
8) Grandadbob – “Mmmnn” Link (There’s “more to learn, more to need” – “for you and I have just begun.” Their roles in place, the two are beginning the game that will become their lives – together.)
I like, ahh, what’s happening. / Don’t be far from me. / Every step for you and I / Brings on the morning. / Oh heavenly. / Don’t be lost from me. / There is more for you and I.
9) Depeche Mode – “Only When I Lose Myself” Link (No one usually thinks how much of himself a Dom must give, and in this case lose, when he gives over to love. That in helping the man he loves to surrender, he himself gets lost/found.)
It's only when I lose myself in someone else / That I find myself / I find myself
10) Poe – “Amazed” Link (Declan finds he’s learning as much from Ashton, as he’s giving in return.)
I’m amazed / When push comes to shove what I’d give to you / Everything
11) Billie Holiday – “The Very Thought Of You” Link (Declan’s devotion to his man, and the way Ash makes him feel.)
It’s just the thought of you, / The very thought of you, my love
12) Shane MacGowan & The Popes – “Rainy Night In Soho” Link (Can’t take the Irish out of the man – a reminder of early days. Dedicated to Ash, who is the “measure of my dreams.”)
Still there’s a light I hold before me / You’re the measure of my dreams / The measure of my dreams
13) Prince – “The Human Body” Link (Declan’s revenge for Ashton’s picking Jim V’s “You Turn It On.” Let it never be said that Prince doesn’t do club dance tracks…lol.)
Can U get me excited / Till my love is long? / Can U let me ride it (Oh yeah) / Till the early morn’?
14) Annie Lennox – “Love Song For A Vampire” Link (Because Ashton loves vampires. Declan blames Ashton very much for bringing this song into his life – but it’s the kind of blame that comes with a smile. Guilty pleasures often do…lol.)
Come into these arms again / and lay your body down
- - - - - - -
15) Bonus Track - Tristan Prettyman & Jason Mraz – “Shy That Way” Link (Not that I believe Declan is “shy” – but in this respect the song is more like a conversation between Ashton and Declan – and “shy” refers to “love-shy.” Remember, Declan made Ashton woe him before he gave into the temptation to love. A challenge to make his well-placed walls crumble and fall.)
well maybe, baby, I like it that way / shy that way / maybe I, like it shy that way / maybe I love you so shy that way…
16) Bonus Track – Melissa Ferrick – “Drive” Link (Have to have a song in which the Master is masterful, yes? This was a late addition, but it * fit * so well, that I had to include it.)
I’ll hold you up / and drive you all night / I’ll hold you up / and drive you baby ‘till you feel the daylight
Gift No. 2 - The Ashton Fanmix entitled "Evermore" - artwork by the luvly talented
piper47 (MANY THANKS for your beautiful artwork!) Tracks & Download Links:
Ashton Soundtrack – to Declan:
Dedicated to Alexis – Mixed by xof – Happy B-day, Lady – Nov 7th, 2005
ZIPS - MegaUpLoad Link & YSI Link
1) Erasure – “Gimme, Gimme, Gimme” Link (Ashton’s longing for fate to “gimme, gimme, gimme a man after midnight” – set just before he meets Declan.)
Gimme, gimme, gimme a man after midnight / Won’t somebody help me / chase these shadows away?
2) Kalan Porter – “Nature Boy” Link (They’ve just met.)
This he said to me / “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn / Is just to love and be loved in return.”
3) Prince – “The Question of U” Link (After their first meeting, when the mystery & question that is Declan draw him in.)
Must I become naked? No image at all? / Shall I remain upright? Or get down and crawl?
4) Leonard Cohen – “I’m Your Man” Link (An offer, the beginning of Ashton’s seduction of Dom Declan.)
If you want a lover / I’ll do anything you ask me to / And if you want another kind of love / I’ll wear a mask for you.
5) Sarah McLachlan – “Sweet Surrender” Link (Sub POV – Everything offered forth in the wake of new surrender’s questions and the sub’s self doubts.)
I only hope / That I won’t disappoint you / When I’m down here / On my knees / And sweet surrender / Is all I have to give
6) Fiona Apple – “The First Taste” Link (Ash’s POV – When the seducer wants to be the seduced.)
Darling just start the chase / I’ll let you win, but you must make the endeavor
7) Garbage - “Use Me” Link (It’s perfect. This song is Ashton.)
Use me, I’m beautiful / Take me, I’m yours
8) Bette Midler – “To Deserve You (Disco Remix)” Link (From the moment Ashton knew it was “more” – that it was love – this is his hope – to deserve.) ((Differing version to the F. Tasmin song from the UK QAF soundtrack – remember – Ashton isn’t Vince! But he is a Bette Midler fan, like all good little gay boys!))
And if I could be granted a wish, / I’d shine in your eye like a jewel. / How I want to deserve you.
9) Billie Holiday – “All Of Me” Link (On the cusp of moving from sub to slave, Ashton’s answer to Declan’s love of Billie Holiday.)
All you took / I gladly gave / There is nothing left for me to save / All of me / Why not take all of me
10) Ofra Haza – “I Want To Fly / Slave Dream” Link (Ashton’s idea of studio “art” music – but also how he feels having the freedom to fly knowing Declan will always bring him home. Ps – Blast this, Ashton does…lol.)
I want to fly!!!
11) The Magnetic Fields – “When My Boy Walks Down The Street” Link (In love and committed, Ash’s humor shines through – because for all that he belongs to Declan – Declan also belongs to him.)
Amazing he’s a whole new form of life / Blue eyes blazing and he’s going to be my wife.
12) Lucinda Williams – “Right In Time” Link (Ashton’s longing for Declan when they are apart – a lover’s longing.)
Not a day goes by I don’t think about you / You left your mark on me, it’s permanent a tattoo
13) Jim Verraros – “You Turn It On” Link (Time to play; time to tease. Pop culture waving its ugly head with this song – from the “GAY” American Idol Top 10 Finalist – As Ashton loves to tell Declan each time he plays it, to Declan’s chagrin. And yes, he expects a spanking for just putting it in the mix…lol.)
Love it when you take control of my body. / Love it when you get me hot, so don’t stop it.
14) Eartha Kitt – “Where Is My Man” Link (Ashton’s sense of humor again – his version of being a Diva Sub.)
A man who knows what I require / the things that I desire – Is there anyone out there who has the nerve?
-----------
15) Bonus Track – Scissor Sisters – “Filthy/Gorgeous” Link (The moment Ashton heard this, he laughed till he rolled. Then he played it at full volume till Declan was in a fit of perturbed giggles himself. Together, it’s a song of which they are both rather fond…lol. Like a private joke.)
16) Bonus Track – Kylie Minogue – “Fever” Link (The lyrics are fun, silly – and I can just SEE the gleam in Ashton’s eyes as he sings this. To his Doctor Declan - lol.)
17) Bonus Track – Arsenium – “Love Me Love Me” Link (Ash decided to sneak this one in JUST for his Declan. Think pop/dance mixed with traditional Russian folk music! Remember, Declan is half Russian! So if you’ve never heard Russ-lish Pop, here you go!!! Lol)
Lady - I truly want you to have a wonderful birthday, on Monday...lol. (She's getting this post over a day early so she can enjoy it over the weekend.) I hope you enjoy this musical look into their hearts and minds; the songs and lyrics where chosen to reflect each man intimately. You may have heard some of these songs a hundred times, but I tried to create mixes that were "them" and the result proved rather ecclectic...lol. So promise me you'll BLAST IT!!! That's always a necessity! (And remember that while I've put the songs in chronological order, I find that putting them on shuffle is just as much fun!!)
Happy Birthday!!!
hugs
xof
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